CONTAINS SERIOUS SPOILERS. SERIOUS ONES. SERIOUSLY SERIOUS SPOILERS.
Captain’s Log, Earthdate 15 May, 4:50 PM, a Wednesday
Last night, a few friends and I were insanely blessed to be able to attend the red carpet premiere of J.J. Abrams newest film, “Star Trek: Into Darkness.” We saw the King of the Geeks himself, J.J. Abrams, “Captain Kirk” Chris Pine, “Mr. Spock” Zachary Quinto, “Sulu” John Cho, “Uhura” Zoe Saldana, “Bones” Karl Urban, “Pike” Bruce Greenwood, the writers--even “Geordi LaForge” Levar Burton came. It was, suffice to say, awesome.
We then got to see the film itself. Now, as I sit here, my clock approaching 5:00 PM PST, I realize that with the exception of a very small handful of lucky ducks, NO ONE HAS SEEN THE FILM YET. Why am I writing this now, then? Well, I want to and I can. To quote the Captain, “I don’t know what I should do, I only know what I can do.”
That being said, if you want to avoid major plot spoilers (as you bloody well should), stop reading now. Flee. Go back to looking at memes or whatever it is you do.
Or not.
Seriously? Still here?
You REALLY want me to spoil it?
No you don't.
You do?
You sure?
Really sure? (Just trying to create space so that the spoiler won't be seen.)
Are you out of your corn-fed MIND?
Well, then. I see that you are. You were warned.
One word:
KHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!
That’s right, people. Khan is back in action played by the wonderfully talented Benedict Cumberbatch. I for one was surprised. I mean, we all knew it was coming. “I am better.” “At what?” “Everything.” And Carol Marcus is there? And in the trailer they had the shot of Spock and Kirk’s hands on the glass in a way all too familiar to us Trekkies? Should I have been surprised? No. Was I? Yeah, I was. I couldn’t breathe for a moment there, I was so excited. (In my defense, rumors that it was Khan were more vehemently denied by everyone involved than I can say.)
But the real question here is not “Why Khan?” or “How?” but “Did Cumberbatch deliver?” Well....yes and no. Did HE do a good job? Yes. But was Khan great? Mmm, not as great as he should have been, no. Yes, I totally enjoyed every moment of that film--every last one, but Khan wasn’t as evil and ruthless as he needed to be. Sure, he crushed a man’s skull WITH HIS BARE HANDS, but he never got quite as evil as he should have been. I mean, in “Wrath of Khan” he was a serious threat, not one to be messed with, murdered loads of people, and put a gross I-still-can’t-watch-that-part bug in Chekov’s ear. He was a proper villain. There’s a reason they brought him back. But they didn’t deliver like they needed to, and, honestly, it’s the writers’ fault.
That leads into another issue: the film didn’t have enough gut-wrenching emotion to it. It was a crazy-fun roller coaster of awesomeness and fighting and snappy lines and memories and fantastic action. But when Kirk died...I didn’t cry. When Spock died in “Khan,” I cried. The crew was there, the scene breathed, the cinematography was perfect, the editing didn’t rush, but this time around I didn’t feel it. And believe me, I wanted to. Opening night? Just saw Pine and Quinto in person? At the premiere? I should have been BAWLING. Like a baby.
But I didn’t. Why? The film in general didn’t have enough emotional high and low points. It was fun, but I didn’t get as invested as I needed to. When Vulcan was destroyed in the first film, I felt it. The scene took its time, the editing slowed, the shots matched well--you felt Spock. (Which is impressive since he’s Vulcan.) But in this film, even when Spock CRIED I didn’t cry with him. And that annoys me.
There are other issues--lack of development for Khan, Bones being just comic relief, moving too fast in the beginning, but really this movie just wasn’t the emotional rollercoaster it should have been. And I’m not asking for vertical drops all the time, but some serious loop de loops and sudden drops would have been nice. It needed to be more Magic Mountain and less Disneyland to continue the metaphor to its end (and now we’re done with it).
HOWEVER--
However--
This doesn’t mean I didn’t like the film. I LOVED IT! Are you kidding me? Oh, it was amazing! Carol Marcus?! Scotty getting a bigger roll? Kirk dies and a bloody Tribble saves him? Spock calls Kirk “Jim”? KHAN?! I mean, come on! It was a phenomenal ride that I would gladly pay to see again and one that I will gladly buy! (Oh, and it would out of character for me not to praise Mr. Michael Giacchino for his much-improved score (least it sounded better in the film) because it was beautiful.) Despite its shortcomings, I think that it’s better than the first (just because of the villain). It’s bigger, it’s a little badder, and it was insanely fun. I fully recommend this movie to anyone, especially Trekkies because despite the fact that Khan wasn’t as evil as he should have been, we must also remember that he and Kirk don’t have the history they have in “Wrath of Khan.” I’m willing to let it slide to allow room for them to develop him because, as the movie industry is learning, they didn’t off their main villain.
So, overall, wonderful amounts of fun. Some issues, but, really, while they sort of matter, overlook them. Get over it. Enjoy the movie. Analyze after seeing another time or two, but really, just enjoy the film the first time or two around.
So, live long and prosper, and remember: KHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!
